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Built on peer-reviewed science of attachment-based therapy
Not pop psychology. Not dating labels. 60+ years of attachment research — translated into accessible, actionable work.
Romila Kujur · M.A. Psychology
Evidence-based nervous system and attachment healing
for adults who grew up without secure emotional attunement.
A question to sit with —
Does “close” always feel “dangerous”?
Do you find yourself waiting for the other shoe to drop in relationships?
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Secure Base RePatterning™ · free to join
Secure Attachment RepatterningSomatic & Expressive MovementNervous System & Emotional RegulationAttachment Trauma-Informed
Who this work is for
This work is for adults who experienced early relational trauma — and now struggle with:
You may recognise one or more of these quiet companions in your daily life:
- chronic anxiety, hypervigilance, or abandonment fears
- emotional numbness, shutdown, or freeze
- insecure attachment patterns in relationships
- chronic shame and feelings of unworthiness
- difficulty trusting people or feeling safe in closeness
- feeling disconnected from yourself and your needs
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“I keep ending up in the same dynamics with different people. I understand the pattern intellectually — but it still happens.”
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“I've done the therapy. Read the books. Done the mindset work. Something still isn't shifting. I think the work needs to go deeper.”
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“I know everyone else's feelings better than I know my own. When someone asks what I need, I go blank.”
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“Closeness feels both essential and terrifying. I can't fully stay — and I can't fully leave.”
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Secure Base RePatterning™ · free · held with care
Your brain built its template for relationships, safety, love, and connection before you were two years old.
Before language. Before memory. Before the capacity for choice or reflection.
That template has been running every relationship you have had since — even non-romantic — outside your awareness, outside your control.
Until now.
Based on 60+ years of peer-reviewed attachment research.
Romila Kujur, M.A. Psychology
An introduction
I don’t teach from a distant clinical voice.
I teach from lived experience.
I’m Romila Kujur, M.A. Psychology — an attachment trauma and nervous system healing coach working at the intersection of attachment science and somatic, expressive movement-based work grounded in attachment repair.
I navigated early attachment trauma myself — through three depressive episodes and chronic anxiety throughout my twenties. For the last twelve years, I have dedicated my life to healing attachment trauma and insecure attachment using evidence-based psychotherapeutic methodology, the clinical frameworks of attachment repair, and skill-building repatterning practices through somatic and expressive movement-based work.
Trained in somatic and expressive movement approaches to healing attachment trauma — and a certified breathwork facilitator.
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My Signature Method
Secure Base
RePatterning.™
Secure Base RePatterning™ is an insecure attachment healing methodology integrating attachment based psychotherapeutic approaches, nervous system repair, somatic and embodied relational work — especially designed for adults healing the effects of early relational trauma.
Most approaches to attachment healing work at the level of understanding.
Secure Base RePatterning™ works at the level of the nervous system.
The body is not an add-on
to this work. It is the primary site of healing.
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Body-based, not just mind-based
Somatic and expressive movement practices that work at the same pre-verbal depth where attachment patterns were first formed. The body is not an add-on — it is the primary site of healing.
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New neural maps, not just map-reading
The work is body- and nervous-system based, relational, and experiential. It goes to the same depth where the original template was formed — pre-verbal, somatic, affect-based, and below the reach of insight alone.
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Rooted in lived experience
Twelve years of personal attachment healing work alongside deep clinical study. I know the difference between approaches that are intellectually elegant and ones that actually move something.
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Free to join · held with care
Most work helps you understand your pattern.
This work helps you form a new one.
The WhatsApp community
Start here — the community is free.
The Secure Base RePatterning™ WhatsApp community is where this work begins. A carefully held space — small by design — for people who are ready to stop explaining their patterns and start actually changing them.
This is not a broadcast list. Not a marketing channel. It is a real community — where I show up consistently with science, practices, reflections, and live events.
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Weekly science drops
Attachment research made accessible, relevant, and immediately applicable to your life.
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Body-based nervous system practices
Short somatic and expressive movement practices you can actually do in your daily life.
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First access to live events
Including the free webinar series and any discounted paid programmes — announced here first.
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A real container
A community of people taking this seriously, held with the same care as the paid work.
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No spam
I show up when I have something genuinely worth sharing. Not to fill a content calendar.